The apartment door creaked open, the sound penetrating an otherwise quiet night. Pitch poked her leafy head out, her giant 'ear' petals dragging along the edge as she stepped onto the balcony. To her left, at the end of the hall, was the stairway that lead to the roof. She stepped over to it, slowly, as if the door itself would be startled and lunge out if she moved too fast.
Her root-pad feet tapped against the concrete, plenty of breathing room between each step. After what felt like a much longer walk than it was, Pitch arrived at the door to the roof. She put her hand on the handle - paused, looked back down the stairwell - but pushed the door open anyways. As she did, she craned her neck down, keeping her eyes fixed squarely on the concrete floor.
She stepped outside, passing by the rooftop planters, the utility boxes, that one weird cable draped across the roof she didn't know the purpose of. She saw the edges of these in her periphery, but largely, ignored them. What a stupid problem to have, she thought. It wasn't until she saw a fluffy, lavender tail bobbing side to side, did she stop.
"Heya-" Pitch said, taking a seat besides her roommate. Root was sat on the edge of the roof besides her, legs dangling over the edge. He was staring up at the sky, only just now pulling his attention away to look at Pitch.
"Oh, hey, didn't expect to see you here." Root scooted over a bit, Pitch's giant ears brushing against their face.
"Me either, honestly-" Pitch laughed. "Couldn't sleep, though. Kinda just wanted to chat."
"Got sick of talking to Pillsbury?" Root grinned. Pitch just rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but smirk in return.
"You know how he is."
"Well-" Root said, smiling more in earnest, now. "Glad to have your company. It's uh..."
Root glanced at the night sky hanging above them.
"... you wanna go back inside, though? I know you have a whole... thing, with the sky."
".. I have no idea what you're talking about." Pitch said, still staring firmly at the ground. Root laughed.
"Alright, sure. Just checking. And, for the record, it's a beautiful night out." They turned their attention back to the stars above. "Not a cloud in the sky."
Pitch kept her eyes on the ground like her life depended on it. She gave a quiet nod, making a vague 'mm-hm' sound. She glanced from her left foot, to the ground between her legs, her right foot, Root's leg. A grimace slowly dripped across her face.
"I mean. Speaking of the sky thing..." Root's ear visibly twitched, his attention back to Pitch.
"Yeah?"
"I guess, if you'll humor me. How does it not scare you?" Pitch asked. "Like... I look up there and feel like if I stop thinking about it, I'll start falling up, and I'll just be flung off into... nowhere, I guess."
Root could see the tiny fae visibly tensing up, just talking about it.
"So.. how do you do it?"
Root let Pitch's words marinate in his mind for a moment. He cast his gaze back to the endless sky above him, the constellations he had been drawing in his head.
"For me, I think, it helps... put things in perspective?" Root said, feeling his way around his words as he spoke them. "There's so much out there, all those planets and stars and the nothing between them. I could be anywhere out there, ripped off the ground and launched into the inky depths of-"
"Please don't say that." Pitch murmured.
"I- oh, sorry." Root continued. "My point is- I'm not out there. I'm here, on my apartment roof, talking to my friend. I let myself get lost in everything that could be, so I can remember where I am."
He turned to Pitch, his smile fading at the obvious confusion on Pitch's face.
"... Let me phrase that another way." Root said. "Have you ever been out on a long job, and finally get to come home and rest?" Pitch nodded.
"Oh yeah. I know the feeling."
"And your room isn't like, big, or glamorous, but it's familiar. And after everything else, it just feels nice to have that familiarity, to ground yourself in?"
Pitch nodded, slowly.
"It's kinda like that. Living in the moment."
Pitch rolled the idea around in her head. "I... think I see what you mean. Kinda."
"Hey, it's a start."
Pitch nodded, still looking at the ground in contemplation. After a minute, she braced herself, and looked up at the sky-
"... fuck"
-and immediately looked at the ground again. Her eyes were wide, body trembling.
"... I think I'm gonna throw up..." she mumbled.
"Ah..." Root grimaced. "Well... baby steps. You'll get there eventually."
Pitch nodded,more in reflex than agreement. She felt Root's hand on her back, gently rubbing.
Pitch sighed.
"... do you ever get the feeling, I'm just not wanted here?"
Root blinked. Hadn't expected that.
"Is this to do with the sky stuff?"
"It's not.... just the sky." Pitch began. "It's... I can't go anywhere in the day without a giant cloak, and I need to constantly ask if windows are UV resistant, or I'll just die. I need sunglasses or a, a normal lightbulb could blind me for a minute. My skin gets all cracked and sore if it's anything less than humid out."
She gestured towards the sky.
"And I can't even look up at night without feeling like I'm gonna die."
Root nodded, their expression softening in understanding. "... I think I see where you're going with this."
"I like it here! I like being here, honestly. But here doesn't want me. I wasn't built for it, it wasn't built for me." She sighed, again, stuck staring at the floor under a sky full of stars. "Phiva themself makes it clear, every day, I should have never crawled out of my hole in the ground."
".... Yeah" Root muttered. Pitch's posture had gradually infected him, and he now sat with the same slumped look. "That's rough, Pitch. I'm sorry."
"I just want one thing to be easy." Pitch grumbled. "That's not so much, is it? I'm not asking too much that I want being able to exist to be easy." She spoke with a venom in her voice that had been distilled from years of experience.
"I know it probably doesn't... help." Pitch suddenly found Root's arm slung over her shoulder, the kobold leaning against her, slightly. "But, to hell with Phiva, I'm glad you're here. I'm happy I get to spend my time with you."
Root felt Pitch shift, one of her long arms reaching up to put a hand on his.
"It might not help, but, I do appreciate it. Thanks." She thought for a moment.
"You're probably one of the best things up here."
"One of..." Root mused, turning the thought over in his head. "In terms of ranking, am I above, or below pizza?"
Pitch snorted, suddenly, her composure shifting from the unexpected joke.
"God, Root, I... c'mon, don't make me choose."
"I'm not even better than pizza..." Root sighed, closing his eyes. "Behold, how the surface corrupts the minds of our innocent Deepfae youth..."
The two of them laughed, and Pitch found herself leaning into Root's shoulder, the latter's arm still pulling her close. His fur was soft on her cheek, and a smile slowly crept across her face.
Between the concrete floor and the endless sky, she was here, now. Tomorrow, she would be at work, digging a hole. But right now, she was here. And for now, here wasn't too bad.